Perinatal Health Providers

Is this the right provider for you?

Giving birth is such a dynamic and nuanced event, you want to surround yourself with the best team possible. Depending on what your goals are for birth, it might look different. Here are some simple things to keep in mind and help decide if switching providers might be in your best interest.

Keep in mind that this is not always a clear decision. It may take time, not only to learn about your providers’ values, but also of your own! As you learn more about birth and experience your own intuition throughout pregnancy, your own values may shift and evolve. The provider you were seeing at the start, may not be the right one by the end. Take your time and do what feels right for you.

How do you feel in their presence?

Do you feel too nervous to ask questions? Do you get quiet? Does your breath feel shallow or do you feel like you have a frog in your throat? This is a sign from your nervous system trying to tell you that it does not feel safe.

If you feel comfortable enough to ask all of the questions on your list without feeling rushed, this is a great sign that your nervous system feels safe enough to take up space.

Your nervous system is the main driver when it comes to labor. They’re the ones creating the hormones and deciding if labor is going to start or stop entirely. You absolutely need to feel safe in labor. It’s one of the most vulnerable moments in life. If you’re not feeling safe in a regular appointment, it’s hard to imagine that you would feel safe in labor. It might be time to switch.

Do your values for birth and delivery align?

This is so hard to identify so you may not notice until you’re halfway through your pregnancy. That’s ok! Obviously you both have the main value of keeping you and baby safe and healthy. However, there may be different values on the way to achieve that goal. Give yourself some time to get to know your provider, not just their policies. For instance, if you’re looking to have a natural birth at the hospital and you ask your provider “do you support natural/physiological birth?” You will probably receive a policy-like answer, not a personal one. “Yes our hospital can accommodate natural births.” While that may be true, it may require other factors to fit within certain policies. Instead ask about personal experience attending births. What was the longest birth they attended? What was their favorite, most inspiring birth that they’ve witnessed? Ask them why questions along the way. Why did the provider choose that action? Why did they take action at that time rather than wait?

Do you have mutual trust?

If you have a female physician and you have good rapport, ask about their own birthing decisions! What did they choose for themselves? Not only does this tell you more about their values, but it’s a great way to connect and build trust if they’re willing to go there with you. Be warned that not all physicians believe in self-disclosures, which is completely valid. It can be ethically grey in some cases. Birthing is so intimate and vulnerable. Having a physician that is willing to reciprocate their own intimate story and vulnerability, might be a factor to consider when deciding if they’re the right one for you.

Does the team work well together?

Whether you plan on a hospital birth or a home birth, it’s important to know all of the players. Should you require a hospital transfer, make sure you’re familiar and comfortable in the new team taking over. Go on hospital tours and ask to chat with the labor nurses! They’re going to have a massive influence on the energy in that labor room. Take inventory of your team (OB/midwife, nursing staff, doula, spouse/support person) and imagine them working together in the labor room. Are there any obvious clashes? Are they able to build rapport? Take members of your team to different appointments to test the waters.

If you bring up a concern, how do they respond? Do they join with you in exploring those concerns? Do they dismiss your concerns by explaining why you shouldn’t have them? Do they continuously put your concerns on hold to “wait-and-see” before creating a plan of action? While you may trust their knowledge and expertise, that doesn’t replace the need for your nervous system to be at ease. Your concerns should be listened to and explored. Until your concerns are addressed and given some direction, they stay there, stagnant in your body, which is already doing a tremendous amount of work growing a human! You should leave your appointments feeling heard, validated, and with momentum for next steps.